Thursday, April 7, 2011

screaming, screaming, and more screaming

last night, anthony, nolan and i went out for dinner.  as we were finishing up our meal, the screaming began.  at a table across the dining room sat two girls (women?  they looked like they were really young 20s) and two babes (young enough to be in highchairs, but i'd say older than one).  i believe only one of the little ones was upset, but, man...that kid was UP-SET!  so, what did the mama do? nothing.  not a thing.  ask the baby why he was so upset?  no.  ask the baby to please be quite while in the restaurant?  no.  try to distract him with something esle?  huh uh.  perhaps pick the baby up or take him out of the dining area?  nope.  even speak a word to the baby?  no!  both girls just sat there nearly half smiling, not saying a word...just eating there food and staring at the kid!  i was so irritated.  less at the whole, i'm-trying-to-eat-in-peace bit and more at the mama-baby interaction.

qualifications to the above story:
1. i have no idea what upset the boy in the first place
2. i do not know this boy or how he normally behaves
3. said restaurant was not the lobster, boa steakhouse or some other fancy was souplantation (known to you north-westerners as sweet tomatoes.  i tell you, when i don't feel good, all i want is there boring, homemade, delicious chicken noodle soup and their totally un-organic, super gnarly, drippy salad bar ranch dressing all over an iceberg lettuce salad)
4. i was going on 48 hours of a mastitis infection complete with fever, chills, headache and any other flu-like symptom you can think, my mood was probably not the best continue...

when we left (roughly five minutes into the screaming...i have no idea how much longer it went on) this poor little man was choking on his tears he was so sad.  i wanted so very badly to go over to her and say, "your child has been screaming and uncontrollably crying for five minutes now.  if you are trying to teach him something and that is how you feel it should be taught, well, i don't agree with you, but your parenting choices are yours to make...but, why don't you pick up your child? talk to your child? remove him from the situation?  if not for his sake then for the sake of all of those around you who are trying to eat!"  instead...i muttered under my breath and walked out totally upset by the situation.

now, before asking my next question, i should say, nolan was being incredibly sweet throughout dinner.  he was smiling and waiving at the surrounding people, eating quietly and not throwing anything.  we were incredibly grateful.  you see, we too have had a few angry baby meals out...when these have occurred, we have done the following: first, try to decipher why he his upset.  followed by trying to solve it or distract him,  combined with trying to talk to him about how it is not okay to yell at the dinner table, especially when we are out.  if all of that has failed, one of us gets up with him and removes him from the situation.  no, it is not super-fun to sit and wolf down food at the speed of light by yourself while your other half is walking around with the baby or walk around with the baby while your other half eats...unfortunately, that is a risk you take when you take a toddler out to eat.

so...what do you think?

a. i had ever right to be as upset, irritated, baffled, appalled, etc. as i was, but did the right thing by not overstepping my bounds and saying something to her

b. i was right in feeling as i did and should have said what i so badly wanted to say

c. i'm a horrible person, shouldn't have thought anything of it, and it is certainly a good thing i didn't say anything...and now you hate me.

d. other (please specify)

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